We all hit that bump in the year when we begin to question where that drive went, that umph.. We look back and try to find the very fleeting moment where it could have disappeared, but we can’t. It leaves some of us angry, confused – but most of all disappointed.
I was there, I kind of still am.
I looked at 2018 as the year of the true “woman boss” me. Fully settling into my position at work, using my after hours to bring my blog and brand to fruition – basically working on myself as a professional was my first priority. Instead – I haven’t written a post in ages, I find myself skipping beats at work and I am constantly lacking the words and creativity I once felt flowing so smoothly.
A few weeks into feeling way – I gave up on myself. And you know what? That’s ok.
It always takes hitting those shades of low to ignite in you what you desperately miss. The second you consciously feel and realize this is the second you become aware of your state of vulnerability.
So many view vulnerability as a negative thing. Why? Because the very definition means one is, “susceptible to physical or emotional attack or harm.”
But damn, let me just say – I’ve never been more creative, thoughtful or passionate as I am when I am my most vulnerable. To me, that’s beautiful. There’s something about the way people carry themselves when their hearts are on their sleeves, when their eyes so innocently view the world around them regardless of their past. When they’re standing in front of you wearing their mistakes, trials, tribulations with pride and grace – there is a true authenticity to their vulnerability. You can feel it, you can see it and you should allow yourselves to be inspired by it.
During this tough time, I’ve forced myself to pick up the things I love so much like paint brushes, old poetry books, journals, music – many old loves and even new ones, like photography.
Embrace these moments of vulnerability. Don’t shy away. This is you, your most authentic self – no one can imitate or diminish the magic that’s created in that space, besides you. So create, with LOVE, write, walk, catch the sunrise even if that means losing sleep – do these things.. because we should always stay true to what inspires us in our most vulnerable states.
I’m writing again, painting again, singing agin – because that’s what inspires me, what fuels my creative juices.
What fuels yours?